Tuesday, July 6, 2010

A Fishy Tale, Indeed!

 

Emmits

Fishy Tale

 

Once upon a line

I tied a piece of cheese,

When along came a mousefish,

And nibbled as you please.

 

Well the next thing I know,

A Catfish comes along.

That poor little Mousefish

Never heard the dinner gong.

 

While Catfish licked her whiskers,

Pleased as fruity punch.

Along came a Dogfish,

 GULP!

 Catfish was his lunch.

 

Then I saw that Dogfish

Turn to chase his tail.

While swimming round in circles,

He didnt see the whale.

 

Im sure you just might think,

How this fishy tale will end.

But what happened next

Is hard to comprehend.

 

The whale opened wide

and the Dogfish gave a

YELP!

But no one was around

That would give him any help.

 

But then the big whale yawned

And said with a toothy grin.

Dont worry little Dogfish,

Im a  v e g e t a r i a n.

Monday, June 28, 2010

Give Peas a Chance

Have you ever seen a round pea square dance?
Nope, cuz no one will give him a fiddlers chance.
He's short and round and has no knees,
But he sure would like a dance...pretty pleeeze?

Why he'll swing his partner and doesi doe,
He don't have no arms but who's to know.
He'll rock and roll around your plate,
And say " Excuse me mam I don't mean to be ate".

You see he'd just like to take a spin
Around your dish and back again.
We know he can't do a fancy two step,
But he can bounce, he's good at Giddy Up!

So if you wish to have a dance
Please just give him a second glance.
He'll be there waitin without boots or pants
Hollering real loud ...GIVE PEAS A CHANCE!

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Good Chair Hair

Sometimes getting your hair done is the best pick me up in the world, but only if you like it before you get out of the salon chair.  Today was a good chair day.  The only thing that's grey right now  is the weather.  Shopping afterwards is so much more fun when you look in the dressing room mirror and you notice your hair first instead of your other ass-ets.  

Monday, October 26, 2009

Crow School

Classes are filling up fast so hurry and sign up.  Here is the list of  the classes still available.  

Dr. Crow.lee’s

School of Bird Brains

(Must be Cawcasion to qualify)


…Peckology …

“Learn who not to peck on”

“Not all Peckers are the same”

 

…Proctology…

“Caw Please”

 

…Cawsmetology…

“Crows feet are beautiful”

 

…Psychiatry…

“Why Do Scarecrows Scare”

 

…Ophthalmology…

“See with a birds eye view”

 

P.H.D. Guaranteed or your corn back

 

Podiatry

“Specializing in corn removal”

 

Neurology

“The Mystery of Bird Brains”

 

 

 

 





Friday, September 25, 2009

Not a Good Blogger

This is a bridge across the Rhine River that we walked across each day and it's chain link fencing is being covered with locks.  We referred to it as locks of love.  I guess couples put their names or initials with a date on them committing their undying love to each other. Then they throw the key in the water I think.  It did look in some spots like someone was marking their conquests.  
Some good German beer.  
Not so good food.  Lot's of wiener art, but not what your thinking.

I finally realized that blogging takes some commitment.  Can't use my excuse about not having a laptop so I could blog whenever I wanted to anymore. Who has time for all of this Facebook, Twitter, blogging stuff.  It takes forever just reading what everyone else is writing.    Maybe it's because I just don't have a whole lot to say.  Why is it some bloggers make it look so easy even a child could do it.  But most of what you do read is not above grad school level so I feel pretty confident that I'm not writing above anyones head.

I did just get back from Germany and have a couple very cool pictures I took of the culture.  Meaning beer and wiener art.  

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

You Sure Got Purty Teeth

I'm sure you've seen those ads online showing how Becky got amazing results by using not one but two different teeth whiteners back to back.  The before and after pictures are photo shop amazing.  So hey a 30 day free trial and I'm in like Flint.  What a scam.  Two weeks after getting my free trial I get another shipment.  Huh, they must have double shipped me by mistake, I'll just "Return To Sender".  Nightmare begins.  I have now been dealing with internet fraud and packages coming in the mail all the way from China shipping me supplements, skin products, green tea stuff and who knows what else because I finally figured out that you can't open anything unless you want to pay return postage.  Getting a postage lesson from the post mistress is mind numbing!  What lesson did I learn from this mistake?  Purty teeth are expensive no matter how much you spend.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Somedays are Just Witless

We're designing our new Spring 2010 baby line and it's time to come up with some cute wit for our new items soooo the pressures on, time to earn my creative keep. But problem... nothing happening in that part of my brain right now.  I thought maybe I should join the witless protection agency and see who's got something good they may be hiding. A couple glasses of wine sometimes can get things going but I may have to just go straight to the hard liquor instead.